Don't shoot the wounded

A few days ago I included a reference to an article by Ed Stetzer, because one part of it really chimed with me. He had been interviewing a pastor who found himself in the midst of some intense personal struggles, and who eventually gathered up the courage to tell some members of the congregation he led.  What was wonderful about the story was that, unlike the typical story of congregations who dump their ministers at the first sign of weakness, this congregation actually supported him. 

"How did the church leaders respond?", Stetzer asked, and the pastor replied: "Very gracefully and lovingly. One leader said, "You've taught us not to shoot our wounded. We're not going to start with you."

Those words have been ringing round my head since I read them. It's terribly easy to pass judgement on leaders, peers, and fellow ministers when their errors are identical to, or even less significant than, our own. Does this response come from some sense that we must protect our own standards by projecting them on to someone else? Do we think we will save ourselves from temptation by punishing someone who has given in? I don't know the answers to all of that, but I do know that the longer I live the more I want to live in grace. I don't see the point in condemning people, in rushing to a defensive position. There's a place, of course, for pulling people over if they are being determinedly destructive, and for attending to any damage that has occurred, intentional or otherwise. But when someone makes a stupid mistake or an unforced error, I'm certain I do them and everyone else more of a favour by helping them get it back together than by pointing out their error and publicly condemning them. And I'm also certain that's what I would want them to do for me.

There is a good biblical precedent, if you want one, in Galatians 6:1 - "Brothers and sisters, even if someone is caught in any trespass, you who are spiritual, restore such a person in a spirit of gentleness; each one looking to yourself, lest you too be tempted." It's the gentleness, I think, that counts. Try and restore someone in a spirit of high-handed superiority, and I guarantee it won't work.

Stetzer's anecdote reminded me of this Chuck Girard song from way back - it sounds very dated now, of course, being 30 years old. But the lyric still bites:

It's easy to love the people who are standing hard and fast
Pressing on to meet that higher calling
But the ones who might be struggling, we tend to judge too harshly
And refuse to try and catch them when they're falling
We put people into boxes and we draw our hard conclusions
And when they do the things we know they should not do
We sometimes write them off as hopeless and we throw them to the dogs
Our compassion and forgiveness sometimes seem in short supply

So I say, Don't shoot the wounded, they need us more than ever
They need our love no matter what it is they've done
Sometimes we just condemn them,
And don't take time to hear their story
Don't shoot the wounded, someday you might be one.